#8 H.
H.
I wanted to take a second today and write about a song that's been on my mind for a while now and how it resonates with me, that song being "H." by TOOL. I'm sure it's shocking that I'm yet again writing about music here, but bear with me while I over analyze this song like any other stereotypical TOOL fan.
I've easily listened to this song hundreds of times, yet as of recently it's been hitting me a lot harder emotionally. The beauty of it is that the song can really have a different meaning depending on the listener, and I've definitely gotten something different out of it on numerous occasions. however recently, I've been contemplating a lot on my relationships, more specifically relationships with my friends. Friends that I care very much about, yet our negative habits and traits only amplify when together, holding us all back in a lot of areas.
A few lines from the song that stick out to me, and that I can relate to the feelings I've been having in a lot of my friendships would be,
"leaves me cracked and empty, drags me down like some sweet gravity"
"I am too connected to, slip away, fade away"
"considerately killing me"
These lines really give off the impression of someone wanting to change or leave a situation, but something is keeping them from doing so. I can relate to these words to an extent, as I feel many of the unhealthy habits that I've picked up and shared with my friends, "drag" me down. However, I'm in a place where I'm "too connected" to simply cut these people off, as my friendship with them is keeping me from doing so.
I believe the line "considerately killing me" adds a whole other layer of depth to this narrative. When I apply this to my current situation, the words create a kind of bittersweet feeling of something good being more harmful in the long run (the term "sweet gravity" can also play into this). "considerately killing me" resonates with the fact that our good times spent as a group often consist of getting into things that we really shouldn't be. As we always have fun and enjoy the time we spend, yet the habits and long term results created can in a way "kill" us in a more metaphorical/emotional sense.
A little more of a personal entry, but I wanted to share because 1, Its a great song and 2, to highlight how songs can have a much more personal meaning and connection when you really get deep into the lyrics and apply them to your own life.
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